I wish you could be here. I wish you were close by. I wish the reverberating vibrations of my Kyoto drenched soul could be infused into your bosom and soak you from head to toe.
My head is swimming with the days events. It has been so impactful, I just might start to cry and drown if I cannot get some footing.
We started the morning at Kinkakuji, the Golden Pavillion. We arrived before the gates opened at 9am. The head gardener for the temple came to greet us and then proceeded to take us to rooms and gardens where the everyday tourist is not allowed, which turned a well-attended garden into a more intimate experience. After spending some time in various buildings we were taken out by the main pond, where the Golden Pavillion sits. I thought that surely here we would have to settle with being a part of the masses, but much to my delight we were escorted past the bamboo barrier and down a path that follows the western shore. Here we were even allowed to tread over the moss to get a good angle for our pictures. It was quiet, serene. An egret a top a verticle stone protruding out of the water made the living painting complete. Some maples are were red. They will peak in 10 days.
We were to meet at 10:15 for the bus, the exit was our rendevouz point. At 10 o`clock I found myself arriving at a line of shops signaling the end of the temple grounds. 15 minutes not to waste. I headed back toward the entrance.
There`s a large bell before one enters the garden, and for 200 yen one can sound the bell themselves. I had the change in my pocket and waited in the short line, behind the young boy with his parents. After they had sounded the bell, first the father, then the son - they came down from the covered bell porch and I was encouraged up and in. A thick braided rope tied to a large wooden beam hung in front of me. Looking up, the bell was impressive. With a motion by the monk, I placed my hands together as a prayer and with closed eyes bowed towards the bell. I then grasped the rope, my gripe was wide. My stance was wide as well with one foot in front of the other so as to keep my balance. Two practice swings - the monk demonstrating the motion through charades.
Now it was time. Time to ring the bell.
I pulled the rope back with much vigor while drawing in a breath. When the beam reached the point of return, with some force, but not too much (the goal is not to hit it as hard as you can, but focus more on the purpose and what it means to be the ring bearer), I pulled the rope forward and downward.
.......................................................... .................. ............... ............... ......... . .......... ... .. .
The bell sounded. It vibrated. Rich and complete. Through the air and through me it passed, leaving lingering traces of parabolic waves in my core.
I was lifted out of time and space.
And like my nap at Tofukuji, I became a part of that sound, and it changed me.
Placing my hands together, I bowed my head and left the bell. Grateful for the experience.
*****
As I left Kinkakuji, the vibrations of the bell left with me. There was a physical change in my heart and my chest felt so full. A strange combination of ready to burst, yet so settled. Contentment and Overjoyed. I felt lighter.
We were heading to Ryoanji. The famous fifteen stone garden that had such an impact on me this spring. I was curious and interested in finding out what it would be like to re-visit so soon. Would it have the same powerful impact? Would I feel the same distinct presence? Would I still enjoy it and find it absolutely fascinating.
Yes, yes and yes.
I do not know why I feel the way I do when I am in that space. All the gardens we have visited are just absolutely beautiful. All are worth the trip. All impactful. But Ryoanji is the only one I feel a distinct difference with. It has a spirit that is very strong, and even though the temple veranda is always full of visitors, I somehow can be there and be there. Maybe it`s a result of growing up in a household of 13. You learn to find the calm in the midst of noise and movement.
I sat on the temple porch for a while. The mid-morning sun seeping into my bones and I am warmed. So much of me is warmed. I sit and try to figure out how 15 stones in raked white gravel can have such an impact. It is so simple, but not simple-minded. Later I asked several people in the group about their experience. "It made me feel like a tourist" "I have seen other gardens more beautiful" "Meh" "It just another wonderful garden here in Kyoto." Some did feel awe and amazement as I did, and it was good to talk to those who felt the power of the space. I wonder what it all means, these feeling I have. I feel like I am supposed to figure out what it is and what I am supposed to do with it. Maybe there is a reason I felt the way I did. Now the journey begins to figure that out.
*****
It is nearing the end of the day for me. For you it is just beginning. I just came from the best lecture we have had yet, given by Professor Sasaki. The lecture ignited my brain - blasted even. It made me rethink my approach to what I have taught at the University for the residential landscape design course. So much to evaluate and condsider and reconsider. And now, how to put it into words. What a task.
So today was a very good day. And there is still time for more experiences. It`s only 5:31 pm here. Time for sushi? Maybe I can save you a piece of toro.
Tomorrow morning we leave for the mountains. We are going to stay by a river where we will make our own version of a Japanese garden. It should be something.
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