Sans Makeup

Today it was either eat breakfast or finish putting on my makeup.

I diligently chose to eat my breakfast - steamed vegetables at that. With some salmon chunks.

I did put powder, blush and lip color on  - so I wasn't completely undone. But I did surprise my classmates as apparently I look very different without it. But not in a bad way - necessarily.

Yes, I got reactions which ranged from saying how great I looked, so refreshed, etc., to another pulling me aside and asking me if I was feeling well, that I indeed did not look well.

Looking well.

Apparently I have not been looking well for some time because I am being asked too many times if I am feeling well, if I am sad - or how am I doing, always asked with some underlying tone of suspicion.

I am...fine?

I don't know. How about - I am in pain? Yeah - I don't feel well? I am tired a lot of the time? Actually I feel fine, but my fine is your unwell?

One day when I first arrived to school I walked to the office to sign in and the first thing the director says is, "Lorien, are you well?" In that suspicious tone of voice. The principal of the school then retorted in a very proper elderly Englishwoman way..."Why shouldn't she be well!?" (Think Pride and Prejudice..."Wink at you, child? Why should I wink at my own daughter, pray?")

Anyway - I haven't been feeling well all of the time, just like how it was back home and most days my back is in constant pain. Non-stop - which is unlike back home. But I guess people can tell...but I still think it's weird. I think it's because I get lost in thought and have a serious look on my face. But I need to get lost in thought if I am going to design properly.

Next time I am asked if I am feeling well I am going to ask them why they think I am not well, instead of reassuring them that I am quite well.

Until then, I'll keep eating veggies for breakfast.